When I was about ten years old, my mom and I ran into a problem at the ski area where were skiing. This problem was 100% the fault of the ski area and was the result of what might be called incompetence. We had to go to some office and ask for help. The person in front of us was screaming at the customer service rep who stonewalled him until he left upset. My mother walked up and said "I’m sorry, but I have problem and I’m wondering if you can help me." The surly customer service rep who resisted the screams of the previous guest said "What’s the problem?" and then proceeded to go out of her way to fix it. Not only did we leave happy, but the employee was happy too.

As we left, my mother gave me a lesson that has resulted in me getting my way more times than I can count in the intervening 36 years. She said "Most people naturally want to help you and the trick is to make that easy for them. You can always yell later, but you start with a yell, you can never take it back."

Sometimes, though, it’s just satisfying to yell, even when you know it’s not in anybody’s best interest. I did it yesterday for the first time in a very long time. I’m still trying to decide whether or not it felt good.

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